Time for an cryptic post that no one will understand, but I feel like making it anyway.

I feel strange right now, conflicted. Tonight I almost started believing it, but the opposite was reinforced (It always was reinforced before. I guess it had been a while since it was reinforced last).
Sure, it's not what I want, but it is a relief in it's own way. I don't have to wonder. But then again... nothing is planned and the future is not known. Anything can happen.
I'm still optimistic even though I probably shouldn't be haha